Parenting is HARD. Teenage parenting is even harder. Single teenage parenting is even harder still. *sigh* What’s a mother to do?
Last month I was having issues with my eldest son, AGAIN. It’s upsetting when I feel like I’ve lost connections/relationships as my son has gotten older. He has his own agenda now and doesn’t feel like he needs to share anything with anyone, including me, regardless that he lives under my roof and I provide for him. Tough, I tell you, really tough. So I had gone downstairs and mentioned something in passing to my son who was doing something I have previously asked him not to do in the house. I was just reminding him, honestly, and tried to keep my tone non-accusatory. Of course it backfired, and he retorted with a statement with some expletives in it. I prided myself in not retaliating with what I really wanted to say, instead I just said, “Don’t even start that with me” and went back upstairs.
The damage, however, was done. My heart was crushed, again, and I felt defeated in my attempts to do what is right. I felt helpless and out of control. What did I do wrong? It was a long night of crying, praying, tossing and turning and more praying. I had work the next morning, which certainly didn’t help matters and only stressed me out more. And then came the anger and stress of having to deal with this alone with his father having left.
My phone signaled an incoming email. I don’t usually check it in the middle of the night (or wee early hours of the morning) but in this case, I rolled over and checked it. I get daily emails from Proverbs 31 Ministries and that was what had arrived at that moment. It was entitled “Three Things Every Mom Should Know” by Lysa TerKeurst. My interest piqued, I opened it and began to read.
It began like this:
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.” Ephesians 6:10 (NIV)
“Being a mom is tough.
I think one of the hardest things about motherhood for me has been my tendency to blame myself for the wrong choices my kids sometimes make.
The second hardest thing is trying to figure out how to fix their issues. Especially when you are hyper aware the situation your child is in will carry great consequences.
Deep is the sorrow of a mother who feels helpless.
Thankfully, God knows what it’s like to deal with wayward children. He feels our pain. He knows our sorrow. And He knows exactly how to encourage us through His Word.” (click on the title for the link that will let you read the entire devotional post)
I started crying all over again, big, heaving sobs that shook my entire body. I had been crying out for help in prayer and God provided answers by way of a single tone on my cell phone. I had been heard. God sent the encouragement that I needed to get me through this situation. What a friend I have in Jesus!
Psalm 145:18-19 “The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desire of those who fear him; he also hears their cry and saves them.”